Mother's Day

Mother's Day comes once a year...once a year! To me as a mother, is sad. We should get one day a month at least..but I am not asking for a commercialized day of recognition. I dont want flowers or jewelry or anything nice. In fact I am asking that you dont spend money, cause I could use that money to buy groceries or new shoes for one of the kids. What I want is simple, but seems to be the hardest thing for anyone in MY house to do. I want someone (and by someone, I mean the other adult that lives in the house) to say, "hey, heres the remote, here is the best spot in the living room and the tv is already on the lifetime channel. Just relax and enjoy yourself, I will be washing the dishes and mopping the floors, doing the laundry and taming the kids." Followed by these things actually doing these things.
My Mothers Day started with my waking up and being told to go back to bed..ok, thats nice but please wake me up in 30 minutes because I have to still get myself and everyone else in the house ready for church. so 45 minutes later when I do wake up, I have to rush myself in the shower, but first I am stopped by my baby girl handing me a home made card. Filled with beautiful hearts and scribbles of loving messages. SO sweet. Now I shower and get everyone moving to go to church. Everything goes great.
My wonderful boyfriend hand made me a card that says how much he appreciates me and is thankful for me and i tear up. I know how he feels, I do, but to see those words in his handwriting and laid out so clearly..its so nice. Thank you.
My bro in law is making breakfast for all us mothers..we dont have to lift a finger! Awesome. He almost burned down my sis-in-law's house, but food was good..even better that I got to eat a hot meal and NOT have to serve anyone. Score 2 for mom.
We get home and the house isnt clean..not even a little. I spend most my weekends doing baseball and soccer and whatever else anyone else wants to do. Relax Lea, that is what I am told. OK. I will lay on the couch (waiting for my mothers day present). He disappears...the kids are napping (which I take as a gift in its self)..I stretch my ear to see if I can hear the water running and dishes getting cleaned..to see if the washer is going waiting for the arrival of the first load of dirty clothes...to hear anything that sounds like my dirty house gets clean..and I wait...and wait...what I can hear is him laughing at the tv show I am watching..I can here him finally fixing the light in the bathroom that hasnt worked in 2 weeks (another "gift" for me).
I finally get us all ready to go visit my mom for Mother's Day. Where the love of my life treats us to dinner (that I order) and where I have to yet again serve everyone and get up and get drinks..ok.
I end my day with stressing over how I am going to bring up the fact that if laundry doesnt get done, he will have no clean work clothes..that if I dont run to the store I wont have anything to make for lunch tomorrow, if I dont take the pizza box out then the house will smell like moldy pizza..how oh how do I bring it up without sounding like I am telling him to do this, or doing it myself..since I have strict orders to do NOTHING! NOTHING!
oh look, we need the water jugs filled, so he leaves to do that..yes! I throw in a load of laundry and gather the big things to throw out in the trash, but first I have to wipe down the bathroom and move the hose to the other tree, because I dont want the one he left the hose on is already flooding..by the time i get only 2 of those things done, my eyes are closing..its taking him a long time to get water..a long time, but I fall asleep so I dont really mind. He finally comes home with a bag and tells me that it was really hard to NOT get me something for Mother's Day (no I didnt forget earlier to tell you what I got, because I in fact had not recieved a gift). He sits down with me and I open the bag. I pull out a pair of capris (the right size! He does listen) and some tanks and an owl shirt (i love owls). I am impressed. So appreciated because I could always use more clothes! Thank you thank you thank you.
As we go to bed to watch a movie, I set the alarm and he reminds me to take my contacts out,(because I "forget" but the truth is I hate waking up and not being able to see right away). I mumble something to him about wanting to wait until I moved the clothes to the dryer (i really was counting on him falling asleep before me and sneaking out to do it lol)..oh of course that he hears! He gets mad at me..seriously upset with me that I would dare go against him and do SOMETHING. He tells me to that he would have managed without me doing laundry and that he would take care of it..ok. I take the contacts out and lay down. I hear faintly in the background.."thank you babe, i love you"..my favorite words. This hasnt turned out to be the worst mothers day ever..the next thing I know the alarm is going off and I am up. To kids crying, lunches that need to be made and a house that still has to be cleaned. MY day is over..this commercialized day that is set aside to let mothers know how much they are appreciated and loved..this day that we should do what WE want..the day for us.
So you ask me..am I complaining about how my day turned out? Am I sorry that I didnt get flowers or jewelry? Am I sad that when I wake up Monday morning, May 10, just another day, I have to get up, get lunches and breakfast made, make sure everyone is showered and out the door on time? Am I angry that those dishes are still dirty and the laundry still needs to be put away? Am I tired of taking out the old smelly pizza box?
I asked myself the same question this morning as I sat up in bed..and the answer is..a little. A little disappointed that my day wasnt this picture perfect mothers day that they showed us on that hallmark commercial. But my real disappoint comes from those damn commercials. Those damn cards that tell everyone that a mother should be served and waited on and should be showered with all those expensive or home made gifts! I am mad that "they" tell us that we should have a day..one day. I am angry that "they" tell us that we should expect all this.
I think we should get one day a month..no one day a week..better yet, one moment a day. And you want to know what?! I do. I get Mother's Day when my son comes home from his dad's house and he runs into my arms and hugs and kisses me. I get Mother's Day when my daughter makes me a picture or reads to me. I get Mother's Day when my step son runs across home plate and looks for me and smiles with that perfect "did you see me" smile. I get Mother's Day when my boyfriend squeezes me tight after a long day and tells me how jealous his co-workers are that he had a sack lunch with little love notes and tells me that yes in fact his wonderful women made it for him..because she wants to.
Mother's Day for me means nothing if it werent for those moments. I am not a mother because I get a day..I am the mother I am because I get all these little moments..because my family might act like spoiled brats..but damn it if they dont make up for it with those little moments.
So I say: SCREW YOU MOTHER'S DAY! I DONT NEED YOU! I DONT NEED YOUR HALLMARK CARDS OR EXPENSIVE FLOWERS! I DONT NEED TO LAY ON THE COUCH ALL DAY DOING NOTHING. TAKE YOUR DAY BACK! Its not for me.
Now having said all that..My birthday is next week. If I dont get to sleep in, and a clean house or a present..there will be hell to pay!!!!